The Magic of Rituals in Everyday Living by Amoke Awele Kubat

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To imagine something, to closely focus one’s thoughts upon it, has the potential to bring that “something” into being....for what is magic but the ability to focus thought and energy to get results on the human plane. Malidoma Patrice Some, author of “The Healing Wisdom of Africa”

I am a ritualistic woman. I bet your mind’s eye right now is seeing some naked woman. She’s painted with white spots, red spirals and a fierce animal mask. She’s shaking her feathered rattle and her bigger body parts,  She’s dancing in a circle, around a fire, while howling at the fullest moon. If you can’t see her at least you’ve heard about her.  She -Who- Goes- Lunatic  at that time of the month. Somewhere, secret, (in those rural backwoods retreats). She’s doing (some other culture’s) ancient shaman drumming and chanting in pre-language sounds. Her problems, old wounds, (and a few enemies) are changed into curls of dark smoke and released into the universe. What powerful rituals!

This is a stereotype of a ritualistic ceremony. However rituals ancient and new, exist and are practiced by all cultures. Rituals do include the natural elements, dancing, songs - the most naked intent. It is recognized that rituals provide us with connections to our spiritual and physical environment. Rituals give our lives deeper meaning and purpose. Individual and community rituals bridge communion to ancestral and divine entities. Given access there is an experience of comfort and guidance, healing, redemption, and grace.

Rituals are important. We equate intelligence with accrued information; the abilities to think fast, talk glibly and spring into action. There are human experiences and problems that this one strand of intelligence, only five sensory perceptions, and departmentalizing behaviors, do not serve. They can’t be expressed or resolved by fancy words, meaningless gestures or the creations of more artificial social constructs. In the absence of something extraordinary in the daily events in our lives, we live pretty much on automatic. There is work, school and invisibility. We have partners, spouses, children, pets, and isolation.

There is stressful chaos then numbing calm. We do gear up for special days and events. In traditional and culturally specific ways, we respond with gusto to new life and new beginnings. Collectively we harness our rage and sorrow when faced with conflict and loss.  We don’t necessarily know or remember why we do what we do - at birthdays, holidays, funerals, natural catastrophes, or surviving the visit  to aunt such and such’s house once a year. We do as we’ve been taught.

Rituals began as ways to cope with the disruptions  in my early life.  My mother died when I was very young. I had a multitude of caregivers and moved a lot. I was sickly. I spent a lot of time alone. As an urban dweller I anchored myself to animals, rocks, stones, plants, water - being in dirt.  I enjoyed  staring at the night sky. I yearned to be among the stars. They were always there. I became astutely observant. In solitude and silence, I  developed eyes and ears that saw and heard beyond this physical plane. I discovered a distinguished voice. It  was not  the voice of my own thinking. It was all knowing, loving and protective.

Later, the Civil Rights, Black Power, Hippy, Women’s Movements, and New Age Spirituality enhanced my world view. My multi sensory perceptions grew with cultural, self and ecumenical spiritual knowledge far beyond what I had known before. I later began to study and practice Traditional African Spiritualities. I learned formal  rituals, chants, prayers and songs to evoke Ancestral and Divine Spirits.

Years ago, as a beloved friend approached turning fifty, she was challenged by what she felt was her own mortality. I began to share the experience of rituals with others. I asked spirit what I could do to support a magnificent woman who often mothered and mentored me. I heard, “ Do a Crone Crowning for her”. Crone isn’t a word used often by African Americans. Our traditional cultures have taught us that elders are to be respected and honored. They hold our collective wisdom. There is no shame in getting old. However, mainstream culture is terrified of aging and dying. Women past childbearing and child rearing duties too often feel discarded. So I threw her a party! She invited all her women friends.

They cooked elaborate yummy foods. My friend, as Crone, told us wonderful stories about her life. We all gave thanks and cheered as she progressed through her lifetime and the wonderful possibilities of longevity. She was able to find the tangled threads of misinformation that said, her life came to an end at a certain age. Our love affirmed her. The knots dissolved as her unique spirit was publicly valued. Since then I have facilitated Naming Ceremonies, Spiritual Bridal Showers, Healing Circles, and Ancestral Memorials. Rituals that invite a collective consciousness share and uplift any condition; births, deaths, chronic illnesses, emotional problems, grief, financial worries, aging, problems with children, addictions, and getting married or divorcing -  all too heavy for individuals to bear alone.

Begin to incorporate rituals into your life. Now. Spend five minutes a day in silence. No cell phones, TV, radio, or computers. Create a private comfortable space. You may feel compelled to light a candle  or burn sage or incense. Take three deep breaths, inhaling deeply and exhaling slowly. Think a simple affirmation. Examples are, I am here. I am loved. I am grateful. I forgive. I surrender. Then sit in silence. As you sit, pay attention to what you hear (or possibly see, smell or taste). At the end of five minutes. Clap or make some noise. This internalizes (anchors)  this experience into your body. Say aloud, Thank you. Continue or end your day as usual. Do this for seven days. Note the differences.

Rituals continue to be important in every aspect of my life. They allow access to non-cognitive and Divine intelligences. I am never alone when faced with adversity. I am always resourceful. Rituals provide the magic my soul needs for the fullest development of my humanness.